It all makes sense!

When I was in my 20's I used to be spontaneous, aside from Thursday nights at the Biergarten and the occasional "big night out" I never knew what my evening would have in store yet now that I'm in my 30's my plans have to be made for the weekend by Wednesday or I'm opting to stay home & rent movies.  Last night I realized why this is & it's actually quite simple.  When my group of friends were all in our 20's we went out every night of the week, every weekend everyone was going out in full force so why would I bother making plans?  I would call everyone I knew on Saturday afternoon to see what they were up to that night & then I'd pick which option sounded best to me.  If I tried that now I would get a lot of "we're staying in", "we have plans with so & so to play cards", "we're just going up to the corner bar for the game & a burger & making it an early night".  

Do you see a pattern?  Back in our 20's there were no "we's" it was all "I's" so of course we wanted to get out & be social & have fun & meet people but now...I'm the only "I" left in a posse of "we" & that is why I'm no longer spontaneous.  If I don't make plans with my peeps in advance to ensure that I can get out & be social then my Saturday night option is going up to the local bar & drinking alone...talk about a killer weekend!  It also doesn't help that 99% of the time when my friends do want to hang out we hang out in their neighborhood (partially my fault) but what good does that do me?  I don't want to meet people in my old neighborhood, I want to meet people where I live now but nobody wants to drive the oh so far 20 minutes to come hang out with me so this also hinders my spontaneity.  

Case in point, I get a text at 8:00 from someone in my old neighborhood telling me that they are at the bar & I should come up.  Well, first of all it's 8 & I have no plans so I'm in my PJ's which means I have to shower & get ready & then pack an overnight bag & drive 20 minutes...unload my overnight stuff & "check in" to my accommodations & then drive my happy ass up to the  bar.  When I arrive at the bar at 10:30 everyone is already wasted & 30 minutes later we are all leaving so basically I got ready for no reason at all other than to wake up the next morning & have to drive home.  If for some reason a friend of mine texted & said "hey, I'm up at the bar by your house, come up here" then I would be there in 30 minutes but that never happens.  So before you give me shit about not being spontaneous stop & think about what role you might play in that!