Holy heart attack without a bun!!

Jeebus Crisp dudes, I saw this today on Twitter thanks to Jamie Oliver & I think I gained weight just reading the "nutrition" information.  First of all I'd like to note that I don't think the word nutrition should be used to describe food that isn't nutritious.  Maybe it should read "notrition information" since it's NOT nutritious, just a suggestion.  Ok so anyway the name of the sandwich is The Double Down and when I first read the name I thought of Swingers of course but then I looked at it & started reading & all I was wondering was if this was made from Tracy Jordan's Meat Machine?  On the episode of 30 Rock (The Rural Juror) where Tracy decides to put his name on a product to make money he comes up with the genius idea of the Tracy Jordan Meat Machine which "makes meat the new bread".  Here is a clip from the infomercial in which he is trying to sell his item.

Anyway, to me it seems that this "sandwich" from KFC is a joke, but when you look at the notritional content of said "sandwich" it isn't a joke, it's a freaking death threat!  It's so odd that just yesterday I was watching the Rural Juror episode & dying laughing over meat as bread & then today...it's a reality.  What has this world come to?

Slow's To Go?!

Do you love Slow's? I know I do & I think it's great that even in this economy they are still busy as hell, making major profits & opening a Slow's to Go location in midtown.  The best news about this is that if I ever get married they can now cater my wedding...hells yeah, everyone will want to be there!  Anyway, check out this article for more info & enjoy all that sloppy BBQ!

photo courtesy of detnews.com

Wanna Lose Weight? Are You Lazy?

Check out this article with some simple 5 minute recipes. Me being the extremely picky eater that I am I always have a hard time with diet recipes but I found at least 1 dish per meal that I would totally eat & probably not have to substitute anything. I think it sucks that everything healthy always includes almonds or cottage cheese or yogurt & just thinking of those things make my stomach turn! Anyway, most people aren't as picky as me so I'm sure you could find something you would like. Enjoy!!

America is fat, big shock

So I was reading the Yahoo article on the worst foods in America yesterday & was very disappointed to learn that Chili's cut the Awesome Blossom from the menu! Granted this item has 1,700+ calories but it was still good & I don't know anyone who ate the whole thing themselves, hence the term appetizer. I noticed in the article a link to another article in Men's Health about healthy food that isn't healthy and you know what? I've decided that nothing is healthy, you can always find someone who will tell you that the organic strawberry you are about to eat is bad for you for one reason or another so I say just freaking eat! Don't eat too much fast food, regardless of what you are ordering, don't eat too much candy sugar free or not, drink less regular or change to diet pop, drink light beer, and exercise...if you follow these rules you won't get super fat & you will die a much happier not to mention full person :) After reading all this crap today I say if you are standing in line at your local Starbucks trying to decide whether to get the bran muffin or the chocolate one get the freaking chocolate one because you are only saving a handful of calories the other way. If you are going to indulge I say indulge just don't do it every day & stop reading all of these articles everywhere on what to eat & what not to eat...we all truly know what not to eat & the key is eating that stuff in moderation.

Beyond Full

Ok so the holiday was good for me but not for my waistline! I ate so much food over the 4 days that I was off it probably could have fed a small nation. After having the feast on Thursday I attended a memorial for a dear friend's mother & the food there was also killer & a buffet so I over stuffed myself yet again, then that night I ate a pizza. Saturday & Sunday I did my best to "eat well" but ended up cleaning out the fridge & feasting on things like corn dogs, tacos, and chicken fingers. I fully plan to go to the gym after work today...assuming I can get through the door! I am eating my lunch now & it's good but I know I'll still be hungry when it's gone, it's definitely going to take a few days for my stomach to re-adjust to smaller portions.

Speaking of the holiday weekend, I heard some of the awful stories of Black Friday. One Wal-Mart employee was trampled to death when he opened the doors & when the store had to close due to the death people were actually pissed off!! In another store in CA 2 men ended up shooting & killing each other initially because of something involving their women getting in a fight over some toy or something & then they started chasing each other shooting & ended up dead. Again, the store had to close & people were pissed!! What the eff has this nation come to? This my friends is why I don't do black Friday...I'm small & don't need to get run over just to buy some video game unit or some shuch shit.

Wrap Up Of Last Week

Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to blogging. Ok, so Thursday night was a little better than Wednesday night as far as sleeping with the dogs went and then on Friday I actually had half of the bed all to myself & other than the dogs waking me up at 6:30 to eat & go out the night was pleasant. Luckily the dogs came right back to bed after breakfast & while one slept on my feet I was still cozy & didn’t wake up until 10, woo hoo!! What a difference though, once I switched over to Doug’s to watch & sleep with Zoey I didn’t even know she was in the bed at all, she curled up at the bottom on the other side from me & went right to sleep, it was so nice especially since she didn’t wake me up until 10:30.

So, not only were Todd & Melissa’s dogs annoying to sleep with their male Caesar eats everything…like seriously everything and the package it came in. Wendy & I went to dinner Thursday night for like an hour & when we returned Caesar had eaten 80% of a package of makeup sponges, half a stick of brand new deodorant and the lotion part of 2 Intuition razor refills! While I was at work that same day he ate 2 donuts along with the bag they came in & the napkins that were inside, leaving no trace of any of it. Todd informed me that prior to their departure he ate T’s birthday candles as well as the package they came in too, at least he doesn’t discriminate.

Other than dealing with all of these animals I had a fun weekend. Saturday afternoon Wendy & I went to the Huron Applefest in New Boston & we ate a ton of food & then stopped by my aunt Gloria’s house & got some fresh canned goods (yum) and headed home. We hit up Mexican Fiesta for dinner & ritas & then went to Howell’s to meet up with our dear friend Mike who was up from Chicago for a wedding of a “friend” and it was so good to see him, it had been quite some time!! We hung out with Mike & Jorge & this other guy (can’t spell his name) and then Jen & Brad arrived & we all shot the shit for a bit & guzzled a few beers before heading home. I slept in on Sunday & then met Wendy & Paul for some lunch & beers at Bailey’s and then finally around 5:30 on Sunday I got HOME!!! My SATC extended DVD was waiting for me in my mailbox so I watched that right away & then relaxed the rest of the night at home. I’m thoroughly enjoying being home, but will have to head back to Dearborn Friday after work to watch Zoey for the weekend. Thankfully Doug gets back on the 15th & I currently plan to remain on lockdown at home the weekend of the 24th.

Catch Up

So sorry I haven't been on here lately, I've been busy doing other things so I figured I'd do a quick catch up of why I've been missing & then get back to missing. Let's see, Thursday night me & Kara went to Huey Lewis & the News & it was awesome. We hung out with Lyz & Larry & their friend Braddon as well as Michelle & Tony, and Kara heard from a friend of hers who used to be a groupie that Huey Lewis is hung like a bear...who would have thought?

Friday I was hungover as all get out & spent the majority of the day spewing red white & blue. Once I was feeling better I pulled myself together & watched some TV...very adventurous I know!

Saturday I cleaned my apartment top to bottom to prepare for my parents arrival today. Once I got all of my cleaning done I rolled into Dearborn and hung out at Howell's with Leslie where we ran into Justin and his posse & NSG Dan & his posse of the evening. Rude jokes were told, we got into a debate with some interesting characters & then called it a night.

Today I've lounged, had keys made, did some Aco shopping (the place is so addictive), and hit up the Dearborn Farm Market which I love & miss now that I live in Farmington Hills...there is no homegrown cheapy farm market by me & that sucks. I got 2 weeks worth of fruit & veggies, some fresh basil & a newspaper for $15. Oh yeah, at Aco I also grabbed a couple of the famed Aco cart girl hot dogs...best in Dearborn & they totally hit the spot!!

I'm gonna go back to watching 90210 with my cat Libby & await my parents arrival!! Have a safe & happy Labor Day & I'll be back on Tuesday!!

Tipping the Scales

As many of you may already know I quit smoking 6 months ago (on the 28th) and I’ve been feeling great ever since, but within the last couple/few weeks I’ve started gaining weight. This makes no sense to me that I would gain now & not say 3-6 months ago. So, today I’m starting a 2-week intensive weight drop to see what happens. Normally I work out on average of 60-90 minutes a week, which is definitely not nearly enough, but this has not changed in over a year. I quit the gym when I moved because A. it was too far away & 2. I needed the cash to have electricity so now I work out at home which sucks but I have no other choice. When I used to go to the gym I didn’t do much cardio I did all weight training & for a while there mama was looking hot, but after Vegas round 1 I lost interest in the gym & would go steadily for 6 weeks every 6 months or so & get my body back & then quit. I have no plans of changing the way I eat, other than the fact that when I have low fat/fat free ice cream for dessert I will be measuring to make sure I’m only have ½ cup (1 serving). See, this weight gain is a bit of a mystery for me really…I know that I’m now 30 & my metabolism isn’t what it used to be but come on, since I moved I eat way better than before. I’ll do a top/bottom comparison for you of food intake living with Doug 1 year prior to the move & then intake living alone.

Living with Doug

Breakfast: Special K cereal bar

Lunch: Michelena’s frozen something or other
B&L are the same 5 days a week
Dinner:

1. Burger King Chix sandwich & onion rings
2. Subway chix teriyaki sub w/ sun chips & 2 cookies

3. 1/3 slab of ribs from Westpoint with French onion soup, fries & tasty garlic bread

4. Jet’s deep dish pizza with bacon & onion
5. Miller’s cheeseburger & onion rings

Living Alone

Breakfast: Special K cereal bar
Lunch: Michelena’s frozen something or other
B&L are the same 5 days a week
Dinner:
1. Whole grain pasta with marinara sauce with zucchini and side salad with feta & veggies & low fat dressing (this salad will be with each dinner)
2. Can of Chunky (healthy request) chicken noodle soup and crackers.
3. Kielbasa & sauerkraut with onion
4. Baked pork chops with potatoes in a tomato sauce with green peppers & onion

5. Tuna casserole with peas & onions

Snacks before would include chips & chocolate but snacks now consist of fruit, veggies, and cheese.

For dessert while living with Doug we would have B&R ice cream or king size candy bars or Ben & Jerry’s or Subway cookies but there was dessert every night.

For dessert now I have fresh berries with light whip cream or low fat/fat free ice cream or 100 calorie candy bars.

On the weekends I eat whatever the hell I want & don’t feel guilty about it either, mostly because that’s when I eat leftovers & stuff or I go out to eat & if I’m paying for a meal I’m not getting something healthy. Plus 1 day a week I usually go to eat with my family & depending where we are going I generally just eat whatever I want.

Basically I could still be eating way better but compared to before it’s like I’m a health nut yet I’ve gained like 6 lbs which to most isn’t any big deal but when you are 5 feet tall that’s a whole jeans size & since I’m poor there is no way I’m going to go out & start buying new clothes, I have to work my fat ass back into the old ones! So, after talking to my mom I found out that our family has a history of thyroid problems, which is why I decided to start my 2-week test. I’m already taking a diet supplement that curbs cravings & makes me feel a little more full (I take this before dinner as I have an issue with late night snacking) and it works pretty well. It’s supposed to balance out my glucose levels to assist in weight loss but it doesn’t boost metabolism or anything, it was recommended in the Whole Foods magazine. So I am taking these, working out at home 20-30 minutes 3-4 days a week, I run laps up and down my hallway, (the people below me must hate me) or I do workouts OnDemand via Fit TV & these consist of salsa dancing, yoga, pilates, tae bo…whatever I’m in the mood for.

Now, I’m not going to tell you what I weigh but after 2 weeks I will tell you how much I lost & if that is 0, then I will be seeing my doctor regarding a possible thyroid problem because this is ridiculous!

Brian's B-Day

So yesterday was Brian's birthday so the crew posse'd up and headed out to Joey's comedy club in Livonia to see our friend Billy and the rest of the Motor City Improv crew perform. Dudes, we laughed so hard during the show, it was great. There was some open mic action going on beforehand that was so/so...some were good, some not so good, but I have to give them credit, I don't think that I could get up there. Since it was B's big day he was of course brought up on stage during part of the improv action, while most of his answers sounded like pregnant woman's cravings it was a riot. The guys were hunting cactus & when they would need a word they would tap Brian & he would fill in the blank with something random, I have a video of it that you can check out at Detroitr that's about 30 seconds long. It's at the very end of his stint up there :)
If you are ever in the mood for something fun to do on a Tuesday this is totally worth it (they do it every week)! The tix were $5 and they had $3.00 22 oz. Labatt & Bud Light's so for $11 I had a great time. A night of fun & cocktails with friends is rarely that cheap!

My Weekend

So my weekend turned out pretty good. I had dinner with Wendy & Paul at Page's and the fillet tip caesar sandwich was killer. On Saturday I ended up making my way to Dearborn & hitting up the Biergarten with Karen for her 32nd b-day. Bernie & his niece Megan were there as well, the bar was pretty busy, got really busy around one & there were a lot of asshole guys up in there. There were probably always asshole guys up in there but because I was sober I really noticed it this time. It was karaoke night & some people were great & others sounded like dying animals, but I made it through the night & had a lot of fun, it was totally worth the drive. I got home around 4:30 after hanging out at Bernie's for a bit & went to bed & then spent Sunday lying around & watching 90210. Karen got pretty wasted so I'm guessing she wasn't feeling too well yesterday, boo :(