"I Calls Em Like I Sees Em!"

Sep 29, 2010

Horoscopes for this week

It's time to read up & see what Cal Garrison thinks is in store for you...I hope it's good!!  Come & get your Real Detroit Horoscopes here.
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Huron Applefest weekend is here!!

Looking for something fun to do this weekend?  Head on down to the Huron Applefest in New Boston.  I've been going to this festival since I was a little kid & it's one of my favorite festivals of the year.  It's a sign for me that summer is officially over which sucks but the tasty apple fritters totally make up for it!  The festival doesn't have alcohol but if you are looking for a couple cocktails then you can head on in to McNasty's and grab a cold one.  There are all kinds of booths of crafts & candles & soaps & goodies for your shopping & viewing pleasure; there are a few rides for the kiddies, music entertainment, festival food, a parade on Saturday & all kind of other things going on.  Not to mention...apple pies, apples, cider, fritters, apple butter & tons of other applecentric items.  Weather is looking to be in the 60's & sunny so it will be a perfect day to be out & about, hope to see you there!! 
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Sep 15, 2010

Humpty horoscopes!!

Hey all, it's Wednesday so that means that it's time for your weekly dose of horoscope, courtesy of Real Detroit Weekly! 
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Movie review: The Switch

Last weekend myself & my girls went & saw The Switch with the free movie passes I won at Hogs 4 Dogs.  This is the movie that was originally called The Baster & it stars Jennifer Aniston, Jason Bateman, Thomas Robinson, Juliette Lewis & Jeff Goldblum.  It is basically about Kassie (Aniston) who wants a baby & is single & not getting any younger so she hires a donor & has an insemination party where everything goes down...no pun intended.  Well during said party Kassie's best friend Wally (Bateman) is all wound up so he takes something that Debbie (Lewis) gives him & a couple cocktails later he's in the bathroom & all loopy & ends up accidentally dumping the cup of semen that Roland the donor just gave her.  In order to not ruin Kassie's plans he refills the cup with his own offering & doesn't remember a damn second of it.  

7 years later Kassie & her son Sebastian move back into Wally's life & slowly but surely things from that night start coming back, especially as Wally notices the random similarities him & Sebastian have & the story unfolds from there.

I enjoyed this movie quite a bit, Bateman, Robinson, and Lewis make this movie!  All Juliette Lewis has to do is breathe to make me laugh & especially in this movie...she makes some of the funniest faces & as Kassie's quirky sidekick she really adds an element of hilarity to a mostly comical yet heartwarming movie.  Robinson plays a sullen boy so well & I'm not a fan of kids but I could have totally reached in that movie & just eaten him right up!  This is certainly not a guys movie but it is a great chick flick that I will totally watch again & likely end up buying.  From making sex noises while eating to collecting frames & never putting pictures in them the boys in this movie sure are different & also memorable & I found this movie to be much better than the critics said.  The only complaint that was had by the group was that both Kassie & Wally have blue eyes but Sebastian has brown...this is impossible so it seems that Jason or Jennifer should have worn brown contacts but that's a small issue & in no way affects the actual movie.  I totally give this 3 out of 4 olives for cast, humor, honesty, warmth & sweetness but honestly...any female could have played Kassie as even though she's the mom she's not really the important part of the movie.
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Sep 9, 2010

The joys of apartment living! Who does that?

Last year I had a girl with a little yappy dog move in next door to me & I had to complain because the damn dog barked non-stop when she wasn't home...like I listened to it bark while I was home sick one day for 10 straight hours. Well recently I realized she didn't live there anymore (shows how aware I am) and then last weekend I noticed a new door mat so I assumed that someone must have moved in.  I haven't yet seen my new neighbor but I think it's a guy just because I could hear a deeper voice echoing when I was in the bathroom yesterday but it could have been from the apartment below me, it's hard to tell sometimes.  Anyway, around 10:30 the neighbor was making so much damn noise it was ridiculous, a lot of banging on the floors to the point that my chair was shaking & I thought it sounded like someone doing gymnastics & jumping off of the couch...like I used to when I was a little kid.  After about 10 minutes it stopped & I went to bed at about 11:30 & curled up with my book when I heard the creek of the main door outside my apartment door & then the slamming of the door downstairs as someone left.  Two minutes later I heard the main door slam shut & then the door outside mine creek as the person came in & then two minutes later repeat the same cycle.  At about 11:50 I heard a car honk & then the neighbor leave yet again & this time I got up & looked out the window & it appeared to be a dude about 16 years old or at least that's what it looked like to me.  This confused me because I live in a 1 bedroom building & a 16 year old certainly isn't well off enough to be living alone nor would my company rent to someone under the age of 18.  

Ok, let's fast forward to about 12:15 when a car pulled in blasting hip hop which I have nothing against but there is no reason for anyone's music in their car to be that loud ever let alone at midnight...the music was so loud I couldn't hear the TV I had on in my room & I could hear each lyric crystal clear.  I could hear two people yelling over the music outside as well which made no sense whatsoever...why not turn down the music to talk rather than yelling?  Well, as I was about to call the police the music stopped so I shut off my light to go to sleep & then someone buzzed my fucking buzzer...at 12:30!  Do you have any clue how high I jumped?  It scared the living shit out of me & then I heard my neighbor buzz the person in & I think it was the person who left like 5 times in 10 minutes who I believe is also the person who was talking over the music.  I'm assuming this must also be the douche who was buzzing me repeatedly on Monday afternoon trying to get in the building but I don't buzz in people I didn't invite over.  

If I have to put up with this shit again I am calling the police as well as the apartment manager because this is ridiculous but I'm really curious to also see who is living in there!  If it's more than one person & not a couple I'd like to know where in the hell the 2nd person is sleeping, I mean, my apartment is a good size but it's not big enough for 2 people, especially 2 people that aren't a couple!
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Sep 8, 2010

Tony & Lola are superstars!

The Dearborn Animal Shelter held a raffle this year for the cover of the 2011 Detroit Lion’s calendar & my cousin Michelle won & her dogs Tony & Lola will be on the cover of the calendar with Louis Delmas.  I thought I’d share the photos from the Free Press, enjoy!
  

Lola, Louis, Tony
Lola getting fresh
Tony making a "joker" face
Butts!
I think Lola is in love
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It's horoscope time again!

Hey look at that it's hump day again which means it's time for horoscopes!!  Here is your link to the Real Detroit Horoscopes for this week, enjoy.
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Sep 7, 2010

Arts, Beats, and Eats 2010

Festival during the day
This was the first year that the Arts Beats & Eats festival was held in Royal Oak after many years of it being held in Pontiac.  I was certainly super excited to hear that it was going to be close to home for a change which I thought was awesome not to mention convenient until we started making our plans to go out there.  I jumped on the site to do some research to plan for making our way out to the festival and the first thing I saw was that we had to pay to get in & I don't ever recall paying to get in when I went to the festival out in Pontiac but it was either $3 or 3 canned goods & the money went to charity but if the money is for charity then shouldn't it be optional?  Doesn't matter, we got wrist bands from a friend & didn't pay because I'm sorry but I've donated hundreds of dollars to charity this year & my giving season is done!  Next I found out that parking was going to be $15 everywhere...all meters were being shut down & all lots would be charging $15...even if you were not attending the festival and I thought this was the biggest freaking rip off ever.  Basically you want me to come to your OUTDOOR festival & pay $18 just to get in the gate...how is that even cool?  That's why I stopped going to the Movement festival downtown, I don't think I should have to pay to be outside.  

Festival at night
Anyway, I found out that you could park at Hazel Park Raceway or Royal Oak High School & pay $10 and get a free shuttle to the festival so Wendy & I opted to park at the track & shuttle it over.  When we got there we got our food tickets which were 16 for $10 but of course a beer was 9 tickets so you were 2 tickets short if you just came to drink which was total bull shit, like really, they couldn't make it 8 tickets for a beer?  Well Wendy & I wanted to get our eat on so we bought tickets & began looking for food which was a freaking nightmare!  The streets in Royal Oak are way too narrow for this type of street fair...we spent a lot of time standing & waiting for people with strollers to get the fuck out of the way (they should designate a family day).  During a street fair the booths are at the curb so there is a row of people browsing booths & then a row of people on the move & then in the middle are the people who are standing out of the way but there isn't room for that here.  You could not look at the art in a booth unless you were actually in it...everyone outside the booths was trying to get to another booth and it got real old real fast.  Waiting in line for food was a major challenge because there wasn't enough room to stand nor was there space between booths to stop & eat or sit or wait for your friend who is ordering food when you aren't.  Bottom line is that this festival was a cluster fuck and so long as it remains in Royal Oak I will not go back.  The stages were all tucked in alleys, the bathrooms were also set up in an alley with an 8x10 sign in a tree illustrating where there were...needless to say we walked around for like a half hour & I was ready to pee my pants before we found the potty bank.  The one booth we really really wanted to hit up was cup.cake & we couldn't find them...we fought that effing crowd multiple times going down every street looking for them & no luck.  

The food I did have was really good but it was not worth fighting the crowd, the strollers, paying for parking, and not a single place to sit & rest.  Aside from the food which by the way the booths should compare who is bringing what because I had a hard time choosing which pulled pork sandwich to order & there should have only been one booth serving them.  Anyway, aside from the food the only good thing about going out here was that we found "Lost & Found Vintage" a kick ass vintage shop in Royal Oak that I need to go back to with my credit card & enjoy!  Aside from not finding cup.cake there wasn't a nut guy & no street festival is complete without the nut guy...no cinnamon roasted anything for me at this festival & that really bummed me out.  So, like I already said I will not be attending this festival again until it moves back to a more spacious location & I know I'm not the only one who feels this way.  Check out the photos (courtesy artsbeatseats.com)...does that look like fun to you? 
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Sep 1, 2010

Who does that?

So I'm thinking that last week must have been idiot week because I had so many effed up things go on but this one still stands out in my mind.  So Friday I stopped at the grocery store on my way home to pick up some food to cook for dinner, a movie from the Blockbuster Express kiosk, and to return bottles for the charity bottle drive at work.  Well, I returned the bottles & got my movie & then did my shopping & got in line to check out.  While I was in line a woman got in line behind me & was looking at the magazines & tabloids & started freaking out saying "oh my God, shut up, this can't be true" to which I said nothing because the answer is no dude, it's not true when it's on the cover of the Enquirer!  
I step up to be rung up and the cashier is scanning my items and this woman is still talking & there is another woman in line behind her so I assume she is speaking to her but since that woman never said anything either I realized that this lady was just thinking out loud.  So then she says "I can't believe how ugly that bitch is without her wig on, have you ever seen her without it, it's scary, she's so damn ugly I just can't even believe it".  Nobody in line nor the cashier acknowledged or said anything to this lady and then the cashier finished ringing me up and I stepped forward to put my bags in my cart and as I was doing so this crazy woman kept hitting me with her purse & while it wasn't intentional there is no way she couldn't feel it, she must have bumped into me 6 times & fairly hard & as badly as I wanted to turn around & say something I bit my tongue.  

I stepped out of the aisle & as I turned for the door I remembered the damn bottle receipts for the charity drive.  I stopped walking so I could turn back in to the store at which time this crazy broad who was walking & reading her tabloid walked right into me & kicked me in the back of the leg which caused the front of my leg to hit my cart & hard, that shit hurt.  So I stopped & turned around & said "what the fuck was that, watch where you are going you crazy bitch" and she didn't respond, she just went back to reading & walking & just walked out of the store!!!  That goddamn C word didn't say sorry or anything & everyone who was in line was just laughing...not sure if they were laughing at her or me but I got back in line to turn in my receipts & just said allowed, loudly "seriously, who does that".  I'm sure some people in turn though I was a crazy bitch but I don't care.  The bottom line is, don't read & walk & if you run into someone say you are sorry!  If I see (or rather hear) that crazy bitch at the store again I will be sure to hit her in the back of the ankles with my cart while talking to myself about celebrity gossip!
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It's horoscope time again!

Well my horoscope isn't the best this week but it does seem like I'm being given ample warning!  How is yours looking this week?
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Meringue dancing dog!

89X Posted this video & I had to share it, too freaking awesome!

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